Well, that was the sentence that keeps bugging me since before raya... I dont know why, but it does. Might probably because my failure of getting selected to play for the national team. Well who doesnt, since I tried so so hard to be selected or to prove to others that I can play (a mistake).
Then came today. I was texted by a teammate, asking me to come @ 1530hrs to play against them. Us the mix against them the chosens...
At first I was thinking of just went there, gave back the glove that I borrowed from someone, and watch them playing. Then I was so damn lucky to re-think the phrase "Got nothing to prove".
I have forgotten why I played softball in the first place.
I mean I dont have to prove anything. I love softball, all this while I didnt prove anything to others, instead I was showing/proving myself that I can play well. All these times, I played softball just to satisfied myself everytime I'm playing well, and get mad to myself everytime I played bad, making errors. I will always remind myself to let others judge the way I play as long as I challange myself to play well, and triumph, I'll be happy. The others will always know how to judge right. What they saw is their perspective. As long as I played well and having fun, people will always can see that, and I bet they know how to judge a person, a player, good or bad.
We lost the game, but I've won and learn a lot. It doesnt mean that if I play any game that I have to prove something to others, thats just isnt me. I have lots of fun as I regain my confident, but I think I have to lose weight I gain lately. All in all, to be the best is not by trying to prove to others that you are the best, but try to prove/challange yourself that you can be above your game, prove to yourself that you can do it, let others judge what they want to judge. It is all up to them. I hope I will not forget those I said.... which was the first time actually, hope there wont be the second.
